Book of Mormon

Well, I've had a rough couple of weeks....

AND


I've been reading my Book of Mormon, I have notice how I am able to handle things way more easily I love it, who would have thought that that would be the case...


Its an amazing book


I'm in 2 nephi 25!!!

YAY

every turn is a wrong one...

Have you ever felt that like ever choice is wrong?

Like you cant do anything to make it right? well thats how i feel.

Every time i try to fix something i just seem to make it worse. nothings going right and im now making the right choices but they dont seem to have any affect on those who told me i was screwing up. so if im making wrong choices and i try to fix them by making right choices why do you not see me??

but then it doesnt really matter when those who were telling you wont even talk to you.

wont even look at you, and they even said that you cant do it alone... then how come i feel like their making me do it all by myself??

I didnt turn for their help in the begining and ya that made things worse, but now im trying to fix it, doesnt that amount to something? i at least thought it would. It hurts to be snubbed by those who are so important to you and it hurts alot when your trying to make an important decision, one thats very hard and breaks your heart.


and its the choice that they want you to make.. man just writing this is bringing me to tears,

i just feel that nothing i do is right and that im all alone... just like before...

i make mistakes and im sorry, but you were always there to help me up.. and now when i need you most, your not. i dont know whether your bitter angry or hurt, but ive made my choice and it sucks.. and i just hoped that they would be there to help me through it.

just like you said you would. But i guess that ive screwed up to bad to fix it.




but you cant even talk to me. Even when im running over with things to tell you.. it just feels that a cold shoulder is all i have to talk to... not a warm loving heart.

I might be very off base... but thats how i feel, and i cant change it.

Injury.... PSH what injury!??

Okay so yesterday at swim practice we were being timed for our events that we wanted to swim.

Before my injury i was the schools best butterflyer. I was going to CIF this year.


But then i broke my collarbone... i couldnt play water polo and i was out of the water for a very long time. so i wasnt building my endurance in the pool... plus i missed playing waterpolo and swimming.. ask my mom i was a very grumpy girl.


But my doctor kept refusing to let me swim, even though i was with out my sling by the 3rd week, i know it was by God that i healed as well and as quickly as i did.

He was afraid i was going to fall on the pool deck and rebreak my collarbone... HEY i know im a klutz... but jeez thats a little insulting.

So anyway i got timed for the 100 fly yesterday and i was swimming by myself. no one else in the pool to egg me on. It was all on me. Everyone was cheering people were surrounding the pool... They all wanted me to do well,

My coach made me promise the first sign of pain i would stop lol

i promised

The first 50 i flew... literally.
nothing could touch me i was hauling so fast..

the next 25 i slowed a little, getting my rythm half way through thats when i felt it, the adrelene was done and i felt the burning of my muscles the slowness of my pull and kick

the last 25 was torture... i had never been so tired. but i finished. and when i hit the wall, my coach had the look of dis belief on his face, and a BIG o' grin came on. It was the look of hope and WE ARE GOING TO TAKE LEAGUE and he said ty: 1:18....

I screamed with joy and sank in the water... needless to say i had exceeded my expectation.


See, i was swimming better than my 1st race last season... SO CIF here i COME!!!!!

only 8 seconds to be dropped... and im golden!

Its been a while.... like ages

hey there!

I havent written in like FOREVER! i know... so i thought i should keep you all updated on my life via this blog... and since i am now TAing for a teacher i thought that i could blog..

So.. life is really good, im healing from my broken collarbone im actually in the water swimming. YAY!! One things for sure i had alot of pent up angry/ energy when i wasnt swimming. i know devour all my food. and i got to bed at 8 o clock... i know im SUCH a rebel!!

im so happy but its so so hard I just have to keep going and going like an energizer bunny!

I am going to CIF this year no matter! lol Soooo i have to keep working hard.

I'm getting ready to graduate and i am so excited! I cant wait to walk! AGH! lol its going by so fast but everyday is slow i dont know if that makes any sense! but thats how it feels... oh and ive got a boyfriend. yep yep... anywho

So i just thought that maybe i can attempt to keep you all updated on my life. Plus my mom says she loved to read my blog.

I have no idea why.

The Great and Dreadful Day came... and went...

1st day of senior year, i wasn't even LATE!


Well I've gone to my first day of my senior year, scary and very uneventful, just a normal day.

shockingly.... here i thought it was going to be something grand... ha ha RIGHT

well my sch. goes like this once everything gets right
0. Seminary 6:10 to 7:00
1.ASL 2- 7:47-8:42
2.Algebra 2-8:49-9:44
3.chemistry-9:51-11:02
LUNCH
4.AP government/honors Econ- ?-12:34
5.AP LIT-12:41-1:36
6.Swim 1:43-2:38
after school is cross country practice/meets
and SYC, plus girls camp....and maybe some Tumbling... MAYBE!


so as you can see my life is hectic busy and just organized chaos but only sometimes is it organized

I'm loving every minute of my senior year, yes even the stupid ones !!! (those make it memorable)

my hero

i know that you all know my mother... and i just want to say that i love her so much and that shes such an inspiration to me... and I'm sure I'm not the only one... mom i love you and i look up to you.. so don't go blowing up any buildings... aha nah id prob do it with you! i just wanted u to know that whenever anything just seems like its going wrong and everything gets so outta control just remember that you've got people that love and care for you so much! i think your amazing and i hope that when I'm a mother ill mean as much to my children as you do for me... woah... now me having children that's scary.

love ya!

SENIOR YEAR... eeeekkk!

so I'm four days away from starting my senior year...

i so don't want to go... its straight up scary like freshman year all over again... i don't want it to be over.. AGH.. i cant believe that i have finally reached this point.. crazy... i know my moms prob. hyperventilating at the thought of me grad. JUNE 11 baby... I'm so excited too... I've been told college is WAY better ha ha i sure hope so.... lol

i don't want to work...

but I'm excited and wish me luck... its my last year and I'm going to live it UP!